Peter Brightman Blog: BE HAPPY IN YOUR LIFE...

We spend our lives rushing here and rushing there - no time to think or reflect - we wake up - put on the coffee - on goes the television to see the news - or maybe its straight onto the laptop to check emails that have come in during the night - messages on the phone - its go, go, go - got to get the kids up and to school - off to work - commute to your place of business - and so the day progresses - we are all the same - maybe the sequence varies somewhat, but think about it - how much time do you spend meditating on the beauty of life? The importance of each moment - the joy of each and every living person and creature - the wonder of life and this extraordinary planet we live on called the Earth?

The truth is that life flashes past us - we tear through our lives don't we - its as though we are sprinting to some magical end game that never seems to actually materialise! It is so important that you truly value each and every moment of your lives. Treasure each experience - the joy of looking at a beautiful tree or garden - the joy of seeing your children grow and of all children you are blessed to meet - The joy of listening to an aged grandmother or grandfather as they tell you of their experiences - the joy of being in the presence of others - the joy of breathing the air - the point I am making is that everything we experience can be a source of wonder and pleasure - even the simple things of life - like washing up - wash-up with a sense of happiness - it doesn't have to be a damned chore - we can get pleasure from the most basic things if we get our minds in the right place - instead of doing something, whilst thinking of something else or worrying about this and that - we all do it don't we - but if you begin to learn the process of enjoying and concentrating on each thing we carry out - life will have a much greater meaning and enjoyment.

Walk in the park and wonder at the trees and flowers - if you are fortunate enough to be near or to have access to some wildlife - look in awe at the amazing creatures we are gifted to have living in the wild, even those in your local open spaces. The birds, the hedgehogs; the puppies that make you laugh; the kittens that chase a ball of wool all over the floor - we can find joy in everyday life.

When we look at the news we see the horrors of war and suffering - were read about the mass migration and the civil wars that are decimating countries - we read of corruption - theft and murder - car crashes, planes falling out of the sky - daily tragedies that make you numb and feel as though the world is falling apart - and yet if your think about it - these sad events make it even more important that those of us that are blessed to live in a society that is free from war should use every living moment to enjoy the wonders that are around us. You will no doubt be saying to yourself - this guy is living in cloud cuckoo land - how can we "enjoy every minute, when we have the mortgage to pay, the credit cards, the school fees, the pressure of every day life - and look at the news"?

The answer my friends is that we need to face the fact that everyone of us will SUFFER at some point in our lives. This is a FACT - we will become sick, we will lose family and friends - we will face highs and lows in our lives why? Because everything is impermanent - everything has a beginning - a middle - and an end - think about it - every thought, every action, every life, every argument, every love affair, every job, indeed everything has a beginning a middle and an end. There will be periods of great happiness in your lives, but inevitably there will also be periods of difficulty and distress - we all lose our parents, we sadly lose loved ones - some of us will reach the heights of fame and fortune - but does it last? NO, how many Presidents, Kings, Prime Ministers, Politicians, Managing Directors, Film stars and Pop stars have been retired, deposed, killed, died, faded into oblivion, out of public sight and mind, out of office, less popular than they were and so forth? OK I am sure you can think of a few exceptions that have kept their fame and fortune, but even those will eventually pass away as we all do - I have written before, there is one thing we will all do hugely successfully - that is to die! WE are born and we die - fact of life and death - I AM NOT being morbid or trying to worry you - but we can't be like a Ostrich with our head in the sand - these things are a fact:

This is why is is vitally important we treasure our lives and value each precious moment of Happiness

I am sure you are saying to yourselves - he's depressed us now - why are we reading this? Well I can tell you - because there is a SOLUTION and there is a way happiness can be achieved by every one of you - this blog is about happiness and how you can achieve it: Please read on:

Isn't it strange how little we think about our MIND

We certainly think of everything else - our thoughts relentlessly moving in all directions - worrying, hassling, arguing, debating, assessing; looking back, looking forward, dreaming - why did I do this or that - how can I pay that bill - does he love me - hell, the rent's due next week - will he ask me to marry him - where shall we go for our holiday - that spot on my face, no-one will look at me now...what shall I wear tomorrow evening - damn, I forgot to buy the printer cartridge - it never stops does it?

Endless thoughts, endless dreams, endless desires, endless worries...it goes on and on doesn't it? - like a whirligig maelstrom miss-mash of thoughts - arising and falling - "I can't sleep my mind's too busy" - how many times have I heard that before?

Maybe it is time to give some serious thought about your mind - after all it seems to dictate your life - What is mind? A simple enough question, but is there a simple answer?

How do you define MIND? Is it the brain? No, how can it be - the brain is a physical thing? You can't touch, smell or see your mind can you? Yet MIND is everything and everywhere in our lives - from the moment you wake you think thoughts - even asleep your mind conjures those dreams that transport you to the heaven's and hells of your own making.

The more we assess mind - the more we begin to realise that your thoughts are ultimately what and whom you are - they dominate your life - every living moment is made up of thoughts one after another like a machine gun spitting out bullets from the ether. We cogitate, contemplate, ruminate, mull, muse, reflect, assess, judge, ponder, debate, deliberate, opine, scrutinise, aspire, dream and act upon our thoughts.

If we wake up in a bad mood - throbbing headache from drinking too much the night before - kick the cat - thoughtlessly crash open a door - knocking poor old Grandma over - didn't mean to - sorry Gran - yell at the traffic warden - shout at the receptionist when you get to work - your mind is grumpy and irritable and it affects everything and everyone around you. Alternatively, you wake and begin the process of controlling your mind to think good thoughts even if you do have the hangover to end all hangovers! Not possible? - Sorry its true - we can all of us learn to begin the process of being aware minute by minute about your mind and the effect you have on all of those around you.

Learning to control your mind by making it peaceful and calm is the art of achieving happiness in this life. But how to achieve this? MEDITATION and the realisation that you can control your mind - your mind must not and should not control you.

A lot of people I have met and discussed this subject with often have some vague understanding of what meditation is. Some esoteric, new age thing "that is a bit whacky"! "Haven't got time for that sort of thing - I'm a Catholic not one of those Hari Krishna dancing, chanting and drumming whacko's you see in Oxford Street"! Others expound intellectual responses - "I'm an existentialist"; "I've studied philosophy - Sartre, Heidegger, Kierkegaard, Wittgenstein, Hegel, Kant to Schopenhauer - I can intellectualise my thoughts and actions - don't need to meditate" - "lot of new age crap" !!

The simple truth is that very few of us have much control if any of our thoughts - we are dominated by everyday life - by ambitions, fears, worries, loves, desires, jealousies, hatreds, anger, ignorance, power and just about every conceivable emotion and feeling our super active minds can come up with.

Meditation is the process of quietening the mind and giving your mind a rest from the hammering barrage of thoughts it is lumbered with day in and day out (throw in the nights as well) - but not only that - it also begins the process of helping you to achieve HAPPINESS

All sentient beings want to be happy - indeed not only humans, but every living creature has a right to happiness. As humans we have an incredibly unique opportunity (as opposed to the animal kingdom) because of the power of our mind and our ability to think to bring the gift of love, caring and happiness to everything and everyone around you in your life. However, if your mind is out of control and allowed to roam the unfettered path of unbounded desire, jealousy, anger, pride, ego, hatred, avarice and all the negative emotions and actions available to our over active minds then SUFFERING OCCURS.

Meditation allows us to re-charge and re-direct our thoughts into the incredible path of peace and love.

No this isn't some whacky ideal - this is a well trodden spiritual path (NOT a religious path) - an inner path of enlightenment that will bring extraordinary peace and happiness to you and everyone you meet. Is this some 'off the wall dream or the rambling of some Eastern esoteric clap trap'? No it is as Toynbee the great historian said " the most important event of the 20th Century - the meeting of Buddhism and West". Buddhism is having an outstanding effect on the way we deal with mental illness, psychiatry, dealing with illness of all kinds, reducing violence as an example in schools and homes, how we deal with people who are dying, the hospice movement and so much else.

This blog is NOT intended to be an advertisement or sign-up clarion call to become a Buddhist - it is however intended to give you a wake up call to how you can bring happiness and peace to your life by re-programming your mind in a peaceful, compassionate and positive way.

It doesn't matter if you are a Catholic, Protestant, Orthodox, Coptic, Maronite or any other type of Christian, Shia or Sunni Muslim, Druze, Jain, Hindu, Jewish, Agnostic or whatever - you can all meditate and the Buddhist path in no way conflicts, hurts or interferes with your beliefs or faith. Simply because it is NOT a belief system. It is solely about love, compassion, caring about yourself and how you can bring happiness to everyone and everything you meet.

How to meditate: There are so many ways to meditate but let us begin with the basic and most simple way. Sit in a chair or if you are supple enough you can sit on the floor with your legs crossed in a lotus or half lotus position, fully and comfortably grounded with your back straight and your head just very slightly bent forward allowing the spine to be straight. If you are immobilised or ill in bed - you can still meditate in whichever way is comfortable - but lying down on your back is probably the best way.

It may help to begin by closing your eyes - your eyes don't have to be closed - you can keep them open and look at an object or maybe a candle flame - just sit peacefully and comfortably whatever works for you.

To begin with concentrate on your breathing - its the most important thing you have - if you stop breathing you die!!! Think of your breathing - the essence of life itself - in your mind think or even whisper - "I breathe in - I breathe out" You will find your mind becomes quiet - yes of course thoughts will arise - but don't try to stop them and most important of all - do not follow them - always come back to the breathing - I breathe in - I breathe out - give your poor old mind a rest - no thoughts just the breathing - again thoughts will come and go but don't follow them - always come back to the breathe. Your breathing will become quieter and more gentle - your mind will slowly become at peace and you will realise how important this process is. The Universities of Yale and Harvard (maybe MIT) have measured the brain of leading Tibetan meditators and the results have been incredible - they can actually see and scientifically prove the amazing positive effect on the brain that meditation has.

Its not as easy as it sounds. Try this for three minutes each morning and then make it a bit longer to five minutes and then to ten. You will begin to look forward to your meditation sessions because it will bring you great peace and happiness. A mind that is becoming peaceful is just the beginning.

I will come back to meditation in a future blog - this is just the beginning - the foundation to be built upon as you learn to work with your mind to help yourself and all sentient beings.

You will learn to wake up each morning and say to yourself "I pray that all people and creatures in the world today will find HAPPINESS and that they may find and enjoy the root of happiness - love, caring, consideration and compassion. And that all people will be free from SUFFERING and free from the root of suffering - hatred, avarice, ignorance, jealousy, anger, fear and desire.

In this positive state of mind each day you will bring happiness to everyone around you - even if you are feeling under the weather yourself. Your every thought will begin to reflect the compassion and care you feel not just about those of your family and friends but everyone you meet. Yes, you'll still want to shout at an inconsiderate or dangerous driver or get angry at the client who is snappy with you, but you will also understand that everyone suffers - everyone at some time in their life has pain and illness, they lose parents, friends and children - everyone SUFFERS - and when you realise this your compassion will grow and grow. We are all the same - we all suffer and we all want to be happy - is this so difficult to understand? We should never hurt anyone or any living creature - I don't care what religion or belief you have - but surely above all else you can see that we must not and cannot hurt anyone or anything - its the same as hurting ourself.

As I wrote earlier in the piece - we learn that everything is impermanent - every thought has a beginning, a middle and and end - and this is reflected in everything on this planet - life has a beginning, a middle and an end, earth itself had a beginning, a middle and one day an end - this means that every moment of your life is precious - none of us know when we are going to die - people die suddenly sometimes with no warning - you must learn to cherish each minute and to use every moment to think positive, compassionate thoughts.

WE are all interconnected - without trees we cannot breathe, without these trees there would be no paper or books, without someone somewhere growing wheat, barley, rice….we wouldn't eat. Whatever we need to sustain our very existence we cannot live like we do without the work, caring and efforts of others - we are reliant on everyone and everything around us on this wonderful home of ours - our planet. The rain, the oceans, the water falls, the wind, the air, the soil, the toil of workers everywhere, the people who make and bake, the helpers, the nurses, doctors, the factory workers, the bees, the birds who pollinate, animals that enrich and imbue our life with so much wonder - I could write a book on this - but you too can enrich this world and all around you - by beginning to meditate, calming your mind - and starting the process of developing COMPASSION for everyone and everything in this extraordinary world of ours.